One year on

It's one year on since Houston passed away. I can hardly believe what an effect his presence must have had on my and my wife's lives. We still miss him, when we encounter a situation or object he would have liked or disliked we always ask each other, "you know who would have liked this?." Yesterday we sat down and looked over the photos I had of him which I've saved to my media player and laughed about the funny situations with him and the odd things he did.

I've never actually had a pet of my own. My family had a cat when I was growing up, who lived to be about 18 years old herself. I fortunately got to say goodbye to her about two weeks before she decided for herself she'd had enough.

I cared for Houston every day, fed him, watered him, watched his health, cleaned his litter tray. We hung out together almost every day and night while my wife worked nights and slept days, he curled up beside me in bed whenever I slept, we batted golf balls back and forth to each other and he cried for me whenever I went out the front door and he wanted to see what I was doing. So, yes, I was attached to him and it was the hardest thing I'd ever had to do to ask the vet to end his life. But I did that for him, too, and I was there with him to the very end.

I won't forget him.

Day twenty nine

Today was Houston's last day.

After my post yesterday things definitely took a turn for the worst. He hadn't had much to eat all day, and his balance continued to get worse.

He had a pretty restless night, he was finding it hard to get comfortable.

We all had a pretty restless night.

He didn't wake up again and ask for food. I got up and he was passed out on the lounge. He then demanded to be taken outside to sit in the sun.
That afternoon when I got home he came and met me at the door and I opened it and allowed him to go out (without his harness or leash!) and he tentatively went out, awkwardly managed the few stairs (was very unsteady) and after about three minutes he headed back up the stairs to go inside.
He spent the rest of the afternoon asleep on his pod.

Although he seemed very much like himself - he'd answer to his name, he appeared to want food and want to go outside - he wasn't enjoying himself and he didn't seem happy.
We knew we had made the right decision, and we also knew we couldn't wait another day.

So, exactly four weeks to the day (and possibly the time?) of his initial consultation, we took him back to the hospital (Sydney University Veterinary Hospital have been amazing during this past month) and had another consult. We were all sure that this was it. Any further tests or drugs would only be delaying the inevitable, and for us that just wasn't good enough anymore.

We had our final hugs and kisses, and then we said goodbye.

I still can't believe that we won't see him again, and we miss him already.
To others he may have just been a cat, or our pet. But to us he was our family and we loved him.

Rest In Peace Houston

Day twenty eight

Houston out the front

Exploring under the car

Today Chris and I had another long chat about Houston and his quality of life.

He is still enjoying going out first thing in the morning; but he no longer gets us up. He waits til we get up and then goes and sits near the back door. So he has no hunger and it's hard to get him to eat anything. Today I steamed a chicken thigh for him and he could only eat a few mouthfuls.

He is also sleeping a lot; and his balance is not so great.

He was busting to get out the front earlier this afternoon, but I had to drop Chris off to pick up his car, so he had to wait til I got back. By then he was passed out, grumpy and groggy, and after only a few minutes (and a wee!) out the front he stood at the front door ready to come inside.

I called the vet and she was not happy with his progress and has asked us to consider saying goodbye to him soon.

I will call them again tomorrow for an update, but Chris and I will definitely take him in for a checkup on Thursday. We know that Houston may not come home with us.

Day twenty seven

Houston having a late night snack of lamb and chicken Twisties

Day twenty six

Houston's big adventure out the front

Licking his lips

Today Houston has had a brilliant day.
Yesterday wasn't really touch and go; but it wasn't a great day.

He is being really picky with his food - apparently only lamb and smoked turkey is good enough for him now!

Houston use to go out the front all the time but we had to put a stop to it after he kept trying to escape when we were coming in the front door! He has been limited to the backyard, under our supervision after an escape into the neighbour's yard, for more than a year now.
But it's one of his few pleasures in life, so today we found his old leash and harness and we took him out there for a little adventure.

He is now all tuckered out; passed out, sleeping, on our bed!

Day twenty five

Flashback: Doing what he does best, 2nd November 2007

Day twenty four

Enjoying his ice cream!

Well, haven't we had a lot to think about these past 24 hours!

Yesterday was very emotional; there were a lot of tears (mine) and Houston was inundated with hugs and kisses!

Today things are a bit more real. We have had to come to terms with the fact that we are looking out for any signs of discomfort in Houston, and that when we do see it that we then have to take him to be euthanised. How unfair is that!!!

As for how Houston is today, well he has had a brilliant day!

He got Chris up at 6am for breakfast, he didn't eat a lot though.

He then was waiting (patiently) for us to get up a bit later so he could go outside. He roamed around outside for a good hour. No sleeping in the sun today!

He had a morning tea of some ice cream (as per his daily photo) and then in the afternoon when I was preparing dinner he had some raw lamb. He then had some cooked lamb while we were having dinner.

So, what are we looking out for, in terms of his discomfort and quality of life?

• when he's sleeping too much, and not enjoying any part of the day
• when he's not eating for fun
• when he's not eating
• when he's stopped drinking water and weeing
• when he appears to be in pain
• excessive vomiting

It is certainly not a fun time for us.

Day twenty three

Houston's first drive in a BMW, on the way to the hospital

Houston being a good boy and waiting for the vet to come back

He was so well behaved!

Having his temperature checked, he really didn't like this!

Today was the day that we were hoping would not come for many many months.

We took Houston to the hospital for a check up (as he still hadn't pooped and he had a lump in his stomach) and unfortunately that lump is his kidney filled with cancer.

We were given a few options.

1. continue as we are and hope for the best - that is the most expensive option; and also the one that would make him sick after each dose
2. get the doctor to email a network of oncologists to come up with another plan for his chemo, to tackle his individual needs
3. continue giving him the prednisolone and losec and waiting til his quality of life has deteriorated
4. euthanasia today

We have chosen option 3.

Chris and I are, as I'm sure you can all understand, devastated. I'm sure I made the doctor very uncomfortable with my crying.

So we're home now. And we're going to be making Houston's last days as comfortable as possible.

He's already had some prawns today; and Chris just tried to give him some squid but he wasn't interested.

Tonight he'll be having some ice cream!

Today's consultation (which included a shot of maropitant citrate) $83.69

Total vet bill to date $3034.31

Day twenty two

Houston more orange than normal outside during the dust storm

Houston is doing a lot better today.
No more struggling to go to the toilet; but he's still off his food a little and sleeping a lot.

Today we bought him a treat - some white bait!!! And he is loving it!

Day twenty one - part two

Hiding in the coffee table

Things got worse today for Houston, since my earlier post.

He'd been straining to pee (or poo) all over the house and he vomited outside.

I called the vet and she asked that we bring him in.

We got all ready and then Houston did a poo outside and then fell asleep in his hat bed.

I called the vet and they were OK with us waiting to see if he feels better tonight/tomorrow.

I'd rather take him in today, but he hates the car and I'd like to give him the benefit of the doubt (and a rest) and not put him through that.

It's so hard.